deficit

I often wonder about the overuse of medication in today's society... especially with children. I mean, do we medicate overactive children because we don't want to deal with behaviors? Maybe they reach that point because of lack of discipline or conversely, lack of tolerance for how a child is supposed to act. Like... is there an actual physiological explanation behind the diagnosis of a.d.d? Ooh i should look that up right now!... no wait... focus... what was i saying? Oh yeah... i think i have add.

I've looked over the criteria that doctors give parents and teachers to determine whether a child has a.d.d. And i have to admit that very few of the criteria described me. I was never the type to torture animals or threaten people with stuff. I am, however, insanely disorganized. I know you're probably thinking that some people are just born neat freaks and others just aren't... but you take a look at my room and try to tell me that something isn't wrong.


This is the dilemma,

what i see when i look at my room: the reflection of the state of my mind; a place where everything is readily available and out in the open

what you see: an anomaly; how could hurricane katrina have hit new orleans then, without damaging anything in between, become completely localized within one room of one house several states away?


I don't know what to do with the big picture. It goes beyond lack of experience for i doubt this is a problem that could be cured with simple practice. When i approach general situations, it's not that i can't decide which route to take... it's that everything disappears from my mind; not just potential strategies for a grand overhaul, but everything. I end up thinking about colors, or spinach, or how i should start a blog or something. I can only handle little details, which might explain why in the midst of my disastrous room, all my clothes that are put away, are neatly folded in a particular and identical way, and arranged according to color on bookshelves.


What i see: order and happiness.

What you see: my insanity.

a.d.d.? Maybe not. They say the problem with a.d.d. is paying attention to too much; taking everything in at once and then not knowing how to break it down such that normal function is possible. oh well. gotta clean my room. or maybe i'll make some earrings... or go to atlanta.